That's intense
Is it morally objectionable to repay my debt to society with drug money?
He just seriously used the word "skeet." Can we please find another way to get weed?
No. Take one for the team.
There's always time for handjobs
If there was a saddle on his sack, she would ride it.
I think I just wrote a poem about your penis but it was totally unintentional.
Note to self: do not ride giant beanbag chair down stairs.
I'm a gymnast. they should know better than to let me get dunk near anything i can flip on
I'm just gonna stay I'm bed where it is warm and cozy and nobody knows me as the girl that puked on a stripper
I was like can I please fuck your hips back into realignment
I had a dream I got back with Amanda. And then cheated on her the same day. Even my conscious is a dick
THERES A BEAVER CHASING ME, ANGRY BEAVERS IS FUCKING REAL DUDE
as a side note pls kill me
So congratulations, your penis has now sent me to urgent care not once, but twice!
Just don’t be like me and break up between Christmas and NYE and then get blackout on NYE and puke in your undies.
Randomize
