i have a strong urge to join the asians in the park doing tai chi. I think im still high .
Btw the nut in my hair goes great with my outfit !!! :(
Wish i knew that 10 minutes ago when i told him to dance with my blackberry while i got another drink
This is how scared I get when I ride roller coasters. And how scared I was when I had to poop when I had herpes.
I brought my laptop into the bathroom so I can facebook while vomiting. New low?
I'm just sayin. Is it sad that I spent my last dollar on a hamburger just to get a paper bag to huff out of?
I'm gonna play a drinking game called "Sarah takes the train"
His threats seemed pretty legit for a 6 year old
This is even worse then that time I fucked a guy just because he had air conditioning.
We left the bar in 2 bicycle cabs. It cost thirty bucks and they took us to the wrong hotel. When we finally made it to the right one we ended up in a room with three randos from alaska. Jammed out with them for like an hour. Those inuits are good guitar players
GUESS WHO STILL HAS BOTH NIPPLES!
All I'm sayin is that I don't want to raise anything. Or deal with anything. Or having anything come out of my vagina. I mean, I don't think that's asking too much.
Is that a question you really want to ask or do you just want to tell you that I can't walk without feeling like my legs are collapsing underneath me
Shower wine is way better than shower beer.
i should probably stop doing things just because i think they’re funny. i’m not going to.
Randomize
