so im kinda of nervous about the whole bust inside event last night
Working on an important paper into the wee hours of the morning, and every time I type the word "situation," I can't help but think of effing Jersey Shore. Those guidos are now ruining my academic life.
Let's make jello shots for tomorrow
What's going on tomorrow?
Nothing, it's Wednesday
Yeah, but there's no serving sizes for dick.
walking around pouring bird seed on passed out guys in the quad.
when you agree to fuck a guy it does by NO means make it okay for his roommate to hide in the closet with doritos and watch
How do I know if porn I have watched is haunted?
If you got tons of KY ads on HuluPlus, it's because I hit "relevant" every time.
well he never texted me back and the pizza I took my rage out didn't deserve such malice
When your hungover saltines taste like hope...
Don't judge me like that. At least the house is getting cleaned. If I have to drink and listen to Disney music on repeat for that to happen, so be it.
You planned on giving him head in the shower?
More like I just fell and it seemed like a good idea when I was down there
Think he has a gf
Yea that shit doesn’t necessarily stop me
Did we go to Florida? My missing thong and DL just arrived in the mail. Return address was Tampa.
i can feel my liver failing just LOOKING at that thing
Randomize
