We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
She's JV to your varsity
her voice honestly makes me want to vomit. i have springsteen cranked up all the way.
just convinced brandon semen are bugs that crawl in your pants and make gooey juice. now hes convinced he has them lmao
And you just kept trying to fit through the dog door and not drop Jello shots.
Just woke up to my stoned boyfriend building a shrine around my bare ass. He'll never leave me.
Like I had no idea he knew how to play girls the way he played me. His major is chemistry for christ's sake.
When I said 'i love my boyfriend' I didn't mean 'send me a picture of your penis'.
Ok so you know that's gonna be legally viewed as kidnapping, right?
Breaking a step ladder over someone's back turned into a really fun game, way too quickly.
Trying to coordinate a drug deal while taking a psych test is not easy.
I just try to date guys based on what I need like I am trying to find an electrician now
You gays are geniuses
Do you think the police would frown on me opening a psych drug pharmacy on the side? Just to dispose of my drugs without polluting the water supply! It is for the animals!
IT TOOK ME LIKE AN HOUR TO DO THAT. DO YOU KNOW HOW HARD IT IS FOR ME TO CONCENTRATE ON ONE THING FOR AN ENTIRE HOUR?!
Is Facebook telling the truth about your nipples?!
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