Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?
I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.
how drunk was i? i pretended i was getting a blowjob from a fuckin dolphin in front of my dad. thats how drunk i was.
Oh, and trying to figure out who wants to do Molly in a frat is like asking damn children if they want puppies and candy. So just bring as much as possible.
Yeah I made some freshmen feed me oddles of noodles and I passed out
You know how girls with huge tits have back problems? Do you get knee problems or something?
The police woke me up so they had no choice but to see my morning wood.
Btw, do you want me to fix this with a box of wine and a chick flick or is this more of a 'lets head to the strip club' problem? I'm just trying to analyze the emotional depth of the situation.
He recreated the night that started all my mothers days. We shared a joint, drank Boones Farm, and dry humped to the Beastie Boys. Then I cried over MCA's death. Best. Gift. Ever.
I'll be the Broncos and you be the Seahawks and you can pound the shit out of me.
bring the pregnancy test and the margarita mix, see you in 15
How early is too early to start drinking when studying for the bar?
I will feed you tacos. I will touch your butt. Happy Valentine's Day ❤️
Nothing like ripping open the box with your keys on a sat R train and throwing back the morning after pill with some coconut water on my way to work at a fitness studio for free
You better have a raging boner when I get to your house and it better be worth missing work in the morning.
Are we at that level of friendship where we can share slutty stories and not hold it against the other person at a later date ?
Randomize