forecast for tonight- shitshow with a chance of tbell
my version of bright and sunny.
i miss you and i wish you were peeing between my legs right now. in a platonic way
i woke up this morning in my bathroom,naked, with my boxers around my face and puke and shit on the floor and wondering why i didn't have a toenail on my one big toe.
compared to you, a hobo is quite responsible.
Please dont jizz on my ds screen.
I know I'm not learning anything when I can't even spell the name of the class I'm taking
your youtube search consisted of "food slideshow" and "the angry beavers"
he called you a drunk bob the builder and you proceeded to explain how you were going to build ramps throughout the house
If people don't want my drunken phone call then TAKE YOUR FUCKING NUMER OFF OF FACEBOOK, like it's just that easy...
she screamed "gravy"!!! in the guys face and then stole the very large mans food in line ahead of us... that was just the beginging of the police report.
Way too stoned bro. Was laying down on my back and thought for a good 30 mins what it would be like to be a turtle stuck on its shell
Apparently "I have the beer shits" isn't the excuse my boss wanted to hear. So sue me
I have nothing to say other than the obvious 'we probably shouldn't have done that' and the less obvious 'i think you bruised my labia major' ...?
Now when you said you'd never sleep with me, did you really mean never on a Monday or never without handcuffs or a blindfold or never on a airplane or never without lots of booze? Cus never is a pretty strong word.
Would it defeat the purpose of a run if I ran to McDonalds?
I don't want to just hook up with random dudes. I've had enough bad sex to know that it's not worth hooking up with strangers
It's not?
Randomize