That arnold schwarzeneger picture looks strikingly similar to paul
Not half as good looking as paul
I'd say paul has bigger bicep peaks, but who am I to judge
I specifically asked you not to be slutty tonight.
so we were having anal, both very very drunk when he started shouting his roomates name
Shes in the fridge organizing my beer collection. I love having a girlfriend with OCD
Is "blowjob enthusiast" a bad costume?
Okay, good. And if you have one of those portable strip poles that would be nice too.
Nicole, you can't keep coming over at 3am wanting to build igloos.
My mind hurts. I feel like I drank sand yesterday.
Well he just said "there's glass on the floor and it's okay I'm only bleeding out of my esophagus" so yes he's tripping
I feel like if anyone knew what an affection erection looked like it would be you
He went to 7/11 first and came back with condoms and a banana "in case we get hungry"
The air I exhale reeks of whiskey and bad decisions
I don’t have enough daddy issues for this shit, make him go away
Thanks for driving us home last night. Also, blanket apology for anything I may have said/done. I blacked out sometime near the t-shirt cape incident
it is time to test the effects of half a loaf of bread and overconfidence on the human body
Randomize
