We are walking down to the lake and then i dont know. Where did you sleep?
Places.
Plural? Please tell.
You finger a girl once and she thinks she loves you. I'm going back to boys. Lesbians are needy.
oh my god. my mom just found my pipe. she thought it was a dildo.
like i said, there should be a sitcom about your family.
She acts like you when your on meds
She acts like batman?
the last three girls i tried to get with all believed in abstinence... i think gods trying to keep me from being a father
i think girls just don't want to fuck you
You can't just say things like "great depression theme party" and then not respond.
Selling Girl Scout Cookies outside bars for higher than retail value has got to be the most profitable idea. Ever.
It was just a friend comforting a friend. Except his penis was inside of me.
Well I found you sipping ron diaz out of a child's dinosaur cup while sticking your fingers in the guy's fish tank and watching the "pirahnas" snap at your finger and laughing
Just slept with a female bodybuilder. not cute. but it was like fucking hulk hogan with a twat. Beastly.
im so disgusted with myself. funny thing was i lasted 15 seconds. she benches 325
I think curling is the best thing to watch when you're baked.
What can I say I sleep with 40 year old Cougars because my mother gave me away at birth and apparently that's why says my therapist
You know you're an adult when you start planning your hookup a week in advance
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That’s all I need in life: vibrators, butt plugs, strawberry lube, and sour gummies
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