Is it wrong to beat off to a girl to determine if you like her or not?
Pregaming for shuffle board at 10 AM. I love spring break.
Hookup with hot guy from gym, check. Wake up to find he's peed in my closet, double check.
Is it weird that I want your dad to go down on me?
he needs a life. he was like frothing at the mouth to cockblock you
Michelle asked what I was wearing tonight. I responded with a g-string and plastic wrap. I've gotten no response since.
A gentleman never tells..... therefore i will neither confirm nor deny the attatched photos
I've actually, minus lsat night have actually changed my drinking habits
I'm getting offered Candy Crush lives in return for sex. Like wtf.
Shower sex is an art that should not be attemted drunk
I'm surprised I didn't lose anything last night. Except maybe my dignity but other than that we gucci.
I'm pretty sure that our Lady and The Tramp Red Vine moment was the farthest I got last night
There are two guys dressed like Spartans from 300 at this bar and they're making out and I needed you to know this
he sent me the greatest dick pic I've ever received.
he actually took the time to cut a fingertip off of a glove then put it on his dick like a beanie. he called it hipster dick.
I walked a mile in this weather wearing nothing but a toga. Zero fucks. Your move Mother Nature.
Randomize
