we both passed out while playing beer pong, woke up in the morning and continued to play coffee pong to cure our hangovers
we used that portable toilet as a cooler to keep coronas. next person who tells me hospitals arn't fun needs to come party in rm 180.
he drank a monster margarita at dinner. had to ask me if it was dollars or minutes that ended in 60.
He had a cowboy hat I don't know where from and he was trying to lasso a snowman with a dog leash.
He yelled "juice on the loose", yes i am sure i need plan b
He tried to give me a shoulder massage while i peed in the neighbors bushes to "make it more relaxing."... I let him... That drunk
I'll be so proud. Like a proud mama bear freeing my slut cub into the wild.
We were apparently using marine hand signals to communicate to one another where to meet up in the house to hook up.
Didn't even know I knew marine hand signals.
Why is my hat full of peanuts?
Don't throw them out, I'm on my way
it wasn't a total waste of time; I mean how often do you get to play scotch pong?
.....fair enough
We smoked with this guy who looked just like Hyde from that 70's show in an alley. It was a divine moment in my life.
That's one good thing about being an only child. I can masturbate wherever the fuck I want
Black magic does not go near my vagina, it's a rule
What is your friends name that I hooked up with? ....I think j found his credit card under my bed
I wanna print it out and hang it on the fridge like parents do with good report cards.
oh the joys of a picture of a negative pregnancy test
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