i felt like cinderella. except at midnight i turned back into a whore.
We did like every position then did it again this morning. Something about him being the little boy i used to make sand castles with just made it way hotter.
well done
I just showed my boobs to our astate representative hahahahahahha
I don't think the people up for their 8am class were as impressed with how many beads i got last night as we were.
For some reason I knew you were going to smell like strippers and burritos when I hugged you.
uhh when the x-ray tec was moving your head you licked his hand and meowed.. i think he knew you weren't sober
Dude...that line about her giving me a blowjob to get rid of her hangover actually got rid of her hangover. Spread the word.
He's the kind you'd bring home and you'd wake up and all your food would be half eaten on the kitchen floor and all your socks would be missing.
I drink more single than I do in relationships. Except with assface.
I'm having a really difficult time dealing with the fact that my dog now shares a name with Snooki's crotch-spawn.
I DON'T WANT TO KNOW THE SCIENTIFIC REASONING BEHIND WHY I STARTED A HAREM ESPECIALLY NOT FROM A GUY IN THE HAREM!
Can we discuss your tits for a sec? That melon patch sprung up over night
Listen you let me know what you're doing after drinking rum punch all morning
I had a dream last night that Sam and Dean had to get rid of a murderous ghost haunting an elf on the shelf. I think I'm ready for Christmas to be over.
THIS IS SO HOT. BYE PANTIES.
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