Do you know that poor pathetic girl that we should be friends with
Id settle for living inside the pirates of the carribean ride.
Ed hardy makes air fresheners now. Now even the air can be a douchebag.
like semen in my mouth is absolutely disgusting but i'd still like to experience it
You're the only person i know who can laugh and talk while puking
He spent 6 hours at the ER after crashing a motorcycle and still came to the bar, Ofcourse I went home with him. He's my hero.
It's a sign that no dudes december is about to start: I have a yeast infection.
My roommate is either deadlifting a bus or having sex. I can't tell which
he puked in the sink and didnt turn off the water before he passed out on the bathroom floor. its been 2 hrs and we finally noticed that the whole fucking house is flooded. to hell with this birthday party
How does she have a hairless cat and a husband it's not fair. Both are hard to come by
Dude. She came to my room in nothing but a trench coat. Took it off and said, "you like" in her Costa Rican accent. God I love college.
Did you or did you not grab my boob while I was making out with the foreign kid?
Blacked out and Irish exited last night. At dinner. On a Sunday.
It may be a clusterfuck, but I'll be looking classy as shit as I watch the nightmare unfold
Um, when I went down on you it got stuck there. Still had gum in my mouth. Didn't exactly have use of my hands to assist
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