Could you please tell me why If you were a 21 year old man why you would want to sleep with a girl who has tinkerbell bedding?
i gained so much weight this year, i put on my string bikini underwear and couldnt see the string anymore! i hate my life.
I feel like I should come with a warning like "Orgasm free since 1983"
We had an indepth conversation about his employment at Arbys..
His blow is so strong I threw up. Buy it. I'm in nursing school I know what I'm talking about.
We just had a sexually tense moment where we both chose the trough the pee. I love gay clubs.
I was barred out and drunk as fuck locked out at 3am in my Indian costume. It was literally freezing outside. I laid down on the concrete and made a bonfire with dry leaves. Then proceeded to ask.the.bonfire nicely to "please dont go out". Drunk me went strait up survival mode.
Are we on the same shift tomorrow and more importantly do you want your pants back?
Too bad I can't un-pee in his body wash
you grabbed the breathalyzer at dinner, blew a 0.20 and told the waitress you'd eat her ass
She was just trying to do dick voodoo. Pretty standard stuff.
Just saw the cop you hooked up with over break. He’s def hotter in uniform.
Tell him to stop shaving his pubes. #Notmyjam
I'm dancing with a sandwich I just made cause I'm so happy how delicious it tastes, that high haha
i woke up and couldnt remember who was in my bed and it was so dark.. i rolled over and started kissing him and feeling his face because hey... if the blind can see like that.. maybe i could too
No one can explain why there is Dora the Explorer shampoo in my shower...
Randomize
