i just walked with a girl who was carrying a chair down the street. apparently she got mad at the bartender and took the bar stool when she left.
I just bought a CD. I feel like a traitor to my generation.
My suggestion that we all just smoke some weed was greeted with a uncomfrotable silence and a 'maybe later'. These are not our people
Apparently I told the bartender to stop putting ice in my drink because it was taking up too much room
i think i swapped my keys for drugs last night
Happiness is watching your asshole boss' police DUI video.
Ok cuz s'mores night just turned into pina colada after noon and it will be mas fun
Stoned in some guys basement listening to ELO. it's like its 1978.
Just do it. I grew some lady balls and did it last year. It's your turn. Time to show what you're made of. Hit it or quit it.
It was like we had a conversation with our eyes.
Was it a good conversation?
It was an awkward, sexual conversation.
I need a light and a towel. ive got cum in places ive never had cum before.
It's Jesse McGoddamn Cartney, the whole world sings that shit
WHAT A DUMBASS ugh I'm so glad he looks like a middle aged dad now
I need to stop waking up with no pants on.
what happened this time
I dont know everyone was gone and there was a bird in the room
FUUUCK. sunburned vagina. this is the worst day ever. i'm not leaving my room until it peels.
Randomize
