I was just at the bank and there was a fat lady wearing a cape. today is gonna be awesome.
How did people poop without Blackberrys?
Motorola Razers?
Stone age, man.
CNN just did a special on how to do heroin safely.. I recorded it for us
He puts stickers to promote his new shirt company in every sack he sells. He's like the donald trump of weed
Pretty sure I just became the first person ever to use the word "boner" in a wedding card...
drunken yoga. on the beach. senior week. you have been chosen <3
Remember when we made you finish your beer after you puked into your glass?
i hate being the asshole.
Hurricane Sex Time is the only thing iv said since it started.
All I can think of is a mama duck followed by her baby ducks, in brightly colored track shoes.
How high are you?
I just want to sit my fat ass down at McDonald's and never leave
remember when I lost my virginity and said I could see myself becoming a sex addict?? Well I'm pretty sure that time has come
...I watched him run on the beach yesterday and I think I started ovulating
I jizzed in his mayonnaise and put it back in the fridge. Shouldn't have stolen my weed.
I also guarantee you multiple orgasams and blueberry pancakes
I did not get pleasing results from googling “Bob Ross goat”
Randomize
