You remember correctly you did get a golf cart ride out but it wasnt because you were special. You were so smashed you were screaming tiger at random golfers in the middle of there backswing.
do you ever just like the smell of your farts?
counting down the days left of school on my birth control packet.
maybe we can find two twins tonight and bang them together and then my life is complete
Look dude I'm sorry I used your bong to snorkel in my bathtub last night
She wore that goddamn strap-on all night. When she was playing guitar hero it kept getting in the way but she just wouldn't take it off.
you kept introducing yourself to guys as "never going to happen"
Straight guys just can't stay away. My penis must have pheromones or something.
The party got hot, we all started raging, took off some clothes, someone threw me in the shower and we all kept raging. Nude Rager, I was there at the point of conception.
Got into Princeton. So excited about the mommy-issue-over-achieving-cock I get to ride the next 4 years!!!
She offered to treat me to breakfast after a one night stand if I meet her parents and sex again if I act as her bf. It may be a trap but its a offer I won't refuse.
WTF? Why is there a pic of my tits in ur dad's office?
she and her cat are both sick as fuck so they just sat there looking at each other with her nose dripping on the cat's. both out of fucks
I am high playing guitar hero naked. Please don't let me die this way
I called him my big strong man today. It's all downhill from here. Matching Christmas sweaters, here we come
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