I often get tempted to walk up to her drunk ass and say, "shouldn't you be taking care of your kid?"
once i realized i was actively trying to drink the beer i was sweating out of my body i knew it was time to go to bed
I just called my cat a slut and she responded. Proudest moment ever.
i know im back at school when i can poke any random spot on my body and expect a 80% chance that theres a bruise there
I have been running off of weed, alcohol, and Mexican food. What is Tallahassee.
She tried to escape and she fell and hit the door. She's gunna freak when she wakes up with only half a tooth.
She basically needs a man who will never act up and take all of her shit
I'm even having trouble finding a guy who's taller than me with no unibrow.. someone needs to tell her its time to lower her standards
ill give you food and tequilla and penis and joy
Your mother may get texts again about women putting dog food up their vaginas and asking for it to be licked.
Give me a minute. I'm trying to buy moonshine from a railroad worker named "Cowboy."
i turned around and there he was, right in my face. i was mid deep throat of a hot dog that i was eating with my hands and no bun. you win FSU, you win.
Man I can't wait till Thursday if strippers and beer are what you consider "research"
Trying to figure out why my back is hurting. And then I remember I got fucked up against a tree last night
dude, totally just walked home...using pizza as gloves
I've started recycling nudes. Why should I take new pictures for every single man?
Randomize
