I'm lost and stupid without you.
And my dad told him he was a great looking guy. and then added "no homo" after.
Pls don't use the words alligator, purple, and sperm in the same sentence ever again.
Not gonna happen. She just told me she puts glitter over the mole on her nose to make it look like a piercing.
the trail of clothing leading from the bed to the door was in the exact order i needed to put them on. underwear near the bed shoes by the door.
I blew him and did charles barkley impressions at the same time. what a pro
I'm going out w/ her for her b-day in a bit. I just talked to one of her drunk friends on the phone who asked if I could "handle 7 lesbian." This could be interesting.
Also, as my manager i'm going to put you in charge of making sure i don't drown.
Is it wrong I want to seduce my ex to prove the point to his current gf he's an ass?
Just found the last picture of me as a virgin. Framed it.
Dude, I puked in the stall for God knows how long. Halfway through, a kid sits down in the stall next to me and starts jacking off, i heard the porn on his phone and everything. so FYI, the middle stall is where good nights go to die
Mehhh. I just tried to type 'extremely', and it auto corrected to 'creek rot'. IT KNOWS WHAT I LOOK LIKE
Had a dream I was doing scat with Caroline. I need to lay off the cheese at night
Would an open wound count as good sex or bad sex?
the twins are trying to figure out which one is the one doing body shots off a janitor in this picture
Randomize
