Just saw a car with license plate GYPSYS that was full of gypsies
After you took the handle off the bathroom door I had to coach the Scottish guy sitting on the toilet, throwing up in his own lap, how to put his pants back on. Yes, I think he won the drinking game.
Just saw a half naked, drunk, 6th grade math teacher throwing small children around to the Titanic soundtrack.
What kind of wedding is this and why wasn't I invited
I turn the corner to find her walking in the front door in a tee-shirt, two different shoes and no pants. All she said to me was "I'm sad"
Woke to a half burnt 20 in my pocket, covered in mud, clothes all wet, so im assuming I didn't use that 20 you gave me for a taxi
he told me not to treat him like a child and then started peeing off the trampoline
My building was evacuated who wants to quake and bake
you puked on the porch, i can see your jacket on the floor next to your underwear. i know your home, unchain the door, you're the worst roommate ever.
I just hate that one day I'll have to tell our children how we met, makes me look like a gold digging whore
Model at car show < day drinking with your favorite sister. Get your head in the fucking game Christopher.
Tim is a child that you physically can't love because he makes it hard for you to even find anything redeeming about him so you debate leaving him forever at the gas station.
Please come over. It's a pajama and burn-2016-in-effigy party
he's 22 and listens to dad music. if i hear one more modest mouse song i'll never blow him again
I'll pick u up. I have to buy a new sofa cover anyway. I swear I've never seem a girl cum like that before.
I did not get pleasing results from googling “Bob Ross goat”
Randomize
