I think, one-on-one, Paul Rudd could be very threatening in like a REALLY good way.
Sorry I wasn't really responding earlier. I was really fucking high and so into that car chase.
Its a sad day when your bush has a better set of hair than you do
I just saw him at the bookstore and all I could think about was him licking your ass
Quiet hours sex sucks. I hate finals.
you were stumbling around in your attic looking for all your swim team medals because you wanted to "feel like a champion."
Just made nachos out of string cheese and sunchips and laying in my bed watching babay einstion..get on my level
you try finding a go kart track at 4 AM on Thanksgiving
I created another version of Halloween, it's called swalloween, whatever girl in a slutty costume you bring home has to swallow or forever be known as the holiday grinch
I just remember being happy that I got that toilet fixed so I had somewhere close to throw up
AND FUCKING MGMT JUST CAME ON. CAN I GO DROWN MYSELF IN LESBIANS OR SOMETHING? IS IT TIME TO LESBIAN
we're fated to lesbian
This Alex the guy who suck your belly ring
I'd rather blow Nickelback than be told he gave me gonorrhea. I'd even post it on Facebook for all of the world to like, share, and judge me.
Our DD will meet us there. The strippers are sending a limo to pick him up. He promised them New Years Eve massages. Said he would still drive us home.
I feel really sorry for my toilet right now
Randomize
