she calls it her "sourpuss" because everyone makes that face when they see it.
'hiiiigh' is saved in my t9 for a reason
all i know is i woke up with a braid in my hair and i vaguely remember a cab driver telling me he would give me $10,000 to get him a green card. and he would take me to turkey. and give me free cab rides. im never drinking on my medicine again. lol.
Nhdgh I love you very much hello becausevs. Vagina pensiono
i failed horribly. studying for that final was as pointless as Vinnie is to Jersey Shore
I don`t remember Saturday, actually
Its ok, i dont remember 2007
She kept looking at me and saying "you are the scary high".
There is a homeless man handing out free beer on the city bus. He has a cooler and everything. I love this trashy yet generous city.
Just in case you were wondering..... I really did just wave goodbye to you with my penis.
They made the rule if I caught the ball with my cleavage they would drink the entire beer pong table. I don't think they expected me to actually do it.
My lecture teach is passed out next to me. I think I'm doing pretty good for a freshman.
On a separate note, I just found out some condoms aren't vegan. Problem.
Hahahaha I can't wait for you to ask "wait. are there any animal by products in that?"
We're trying to make our wedding vows nice but meeting on OkCupid fucks that up entirely.
I just made my mom buy me lube. I've reached a new level of broke.
His relationship is over as soon as he sees my boobs. I’m going to titty fuck my way into his heart
Randomize