sorry probably not gonna make it :( kinda tied up right now
sad face, r u gay?... wait like really tied up?
:)
I used a physics textbook to prop her up so she wouldn't choke on her vomit...see I have learned something from statics class.
So Ryan had to wash the dishes. His solution: take a shower with them. I'm never eating at his house again.
The guy in the cast riped the tap off the keg and hit steve with it
I wish a box of wine came w a hose. It'd be so much easier to drink from.
She can't meet us until 830...there's no hope for our sobriety at that hour
He just walked from his house to mine. Walked in and asked for a hug and then left.. And he's sober.
Yeah I had this grand plan to bring flaming dr pepper shots to some girls and say "these shots are hot, but not as hot as you" but instead I lit the bar on fire
Lube filled water balloons always make for a good time
Only Tommy would bring a stripper pole to a bonfire
Either she's trying to smother me and failing, or she just has a really bad sense of where her tits should go.
I'm not breaking up with him because his husky is having puppies.
First thing I find in the car I just pick up from my grandpa? A discount card for the strip club down the road from his apartment. The force is still strong.
I repeat do not go to a jail visit drunk, those stools are easy to fall off.
His parents then knew me as the blackout who took care of him and stole his watch
Randomize
