well look at the bright side
maybe you can be on an episode of "I Didn't Know I Was Pregnant"
It's always exciting to touch a new boob.
so basically i'm the" little sister", he's the "big brother" and we just fucked
Just got thank you sex for shoveling the driveway. I cant wait for the next blizzard
We have been pregaming the shutdown of the government since Tuesday. Send help, and some more liquor.
How bad does the situation have to be before its ok to attempt 'catastrophic event sex'?
i asked the cop if we could stop and do a chinese firedrill.... he said no.
I just showered sitting down with a sippy cup of water in there with me. It took 40 minutes. That hungover.
I screamed "I want dick!" in the middle of the intersection. So many hot guys. I wish you were here.
Remember when I got punched in the face on NYE last year? I don't
we fucked in the backseat of my car at the observatory, right under the stars. it was a starry, orgasmic filled night
Pandora was on point with the sex music tonight
But if you do poop yourself let me know. I want that as a tagline. "So funny she'll make you shit yourself."
I went to finger her and found a penny. I think ill keep it.
shes rolling around in the floor yelling my vagina hates me
Randomize
