i think he just uses that whole "grew up in a castle" thing to get pussy
Best feeling in the world? holding your pee all day for a negative preggo test
I could give you a full detailed description of 75% of the penises in that room
Just spent 3 hours on the Mcdonalds website. I don't know what to do with myself now that college is over.
Note to self not a good idea to try and make out with a girl when she's crying over her boyfriend
Will you just get over yourself and come over here and give me that dick...then you can go back home and continue to cry over us breaking up. Thank you
he just hooked up with some chick in a bedroom upstairs so I just went to sleep in the pantry closet...
We took it as we must go to waffle house or else we will upset the gods.
the worst part was waking up this morning to his skrillex ringtone.....when was it ever okay for friends to let other friends go home WITH GUYS LIKE THAT!?
Shawn wouldn't stop singing about his cock on the ride home that night it freaked my girlfriend out how consistent he was
He was my first. He knew. He knew right there I was wrapped around his penis.
My dry spell starts kindergarten this fall...
They grow up so fast.
The twitch Bob Ross stream is the happiest little hangover cure ever.
That is priceless. You walk into her house, fuck her husband and demand Chinese food. Your an inspiration to us all.
We haven't had hot water in our dorm all weekend. Do you know if there is any other way to wash off shame?
Randomize
