So that's a yes to the cocaine usage and a no to the rollerblading
i don't remember but I assumed it was bad when I woke up with directions from his house to mine already pulled up on my phone
i keep forgetting that not all of my female friends are bisexual.
There is a slip-n-slide in the hallway and a girl just did it topless cuz I told her it was my birthday. Where are you?
Seriously he's so hot. And it's so hard to flirt with a deaf guy
Bud light lime after 12 shots of vladdy is like frolickin in a meadow of sweet flavor
Thats like me asking what you think of antisocial polish guys with mysterious rashes
So much easier to puke and rally now that my gluten's under control
we are the apple cider girls!
Curdled. you forgot that word. It was a curdled buttery nipple shot.
Was asked out on a date tonight on Linked In. That creepy genius at apple that touched my butt one time in the back stairwell. I thinks it's fair to say I've hit rock bottom.
Well I kept shouting "you're groovy" at him and then I had a 15-minute argument with the bouncer about how many 9s there are in 100... it was definitely time to go home.
He drove me to my therapist appointment because I was too drunk to drive. Total keeper.
The only words we could get out of him as he stared catatonically into space were "Everyone I know and love is dead"
Like if I exploded right now there would be cum and fajitas everywhere.
I snuck a teenager into a club last nite, I felt like such a criminal. It was Awsome
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