When I asked if she spit or swallow she replied "I never learned how to spit"
I have your camera. You have 35 naked pictures of me. you're welcome.
i'm ready for this baby to gtfo so i can get coked out.
Vodka and Eggs at 9:30AM = thank you, America.
Slurping strawberries throug a straw. It feels like the kool-aid man is coming in my mouth.
And dont tell me its his job to cockblock me just because he's my boyfriend.
You made a glowstick headband with a helium balloon tied around it and climbed a tree in high heels. I was impressed.
Do you know how hard it is to was the scent of sex from your hair in a gas station bathroom?!
ok thanks goodnight
Also before you go to bed i just have to get it out there that i really like macklemore as a person
YOU TRIED TO SWIM IN HER FISHTANK. I don't think she's going to call you.
He slapped my ass... He best ask me out. Or figure out how to unslap my ass.
I try not to flex my sex appeal too much around the engineers, it's like feeding bears...always ends in disaster.
You just kept telling everyone to call you MFT.. Mother Fucking Tornado.
She pulled out a water gun filled with vodka and called it her weapon of choice tonight. She's fine.
Was just at a stoplight and some kid was smoking a blunt and we smiled at him and he offered to pass it between cars... Only in Rockford
Randomize
