You look like a girl that would like strip clubs
he said he wished he had more hands so he could firmly hold my boobs.
Can I use cash for clunkers to trade in her boobs for a new set of 18 year old tits?
Its worth a shot.
Her pussy was so beautiful. That's what I'LL miss the most. Not the omelets. You're the roommate, obviously our priorities on this situation are vastly different.
fun fact: in my eskimo family tree i am the only brunette
We got the DJ into it too! "If there are any dudes into other dudes out there, my man mark is looking to get pounded. Buy him a drink stat!"
Drunk naked twister. My place. Heath is trying to use his dick as a third leg.
I'm sorry but you're choosing a girl that faked a pregnancy when you wouldn't return her calls over a more attractive sane girl who you begged for a chance with last week? God you're a loser.
Try to make ecstasy cheese. Capitalize on the molly and greek yogurt trends. MARKETING
I didn't think four grown drunk men could cuddle on a twin size bed, but we found a way.
Accomplishment of the day: changing my tampon at 38,000 ft with turbulence. Fasten seatbelt sign was definitely on.
Can I pee and smoke my bong at the same time or is that like eating on the toilet
They are like the regular squirrels and we are flying squirrels
if you and your penis don't hurry up, I'm getting drunk without you.
you said you didn't feel like drinking anymore so you mixed vodka with your applesauce and ate it
Randomize
