Blackout barefoot maybe pregnant
Good decisions....
Just got blue box Mac and cheese things are looking up
I got my nipple pierced! I love it so much!
Well, there goes breastfeeding.
This is a mass text. Does anyone know where I am?
Most guys don't get turned on by "skinny, gangly legged girl with glasses laying in bed touching herself." You better start working on your diction if you're gonna keep up the sexting.
i literally in my bathroom watching tv from across the hall while trying not to fall asleep with my dog keeping my feet warm. wednesday's shouldnt be like this
i guess i had fun last thursday night because when i got on the drunk bus this thursday night everyone immediatley started chanting my name and telling me to do a bus flip
whats a bus flip?
idk but apparently i invented it
If fate has that penis in my future.....I'm down.
careful of the bathroom.... theres some drunken ninja turtles in there....
and this is why we should make december sharting awareness month.
CHEMICAL ENGINEER. God my mom would be so proud of me.
Nhl reached an agreement. I plan on getting me some celebratory sex from a hockey player.
I have bite marks all over my ass. Is that an acceptable excuse for missing class?
They were arguing about who would hit the piñata first so naturally you tore it open with your hands. You broke the piñata and their hearts.
He sent me a dick pic. I am fighting the urge to send him a "sorry for your loss" card.
No my problem is I'm working and its a beautiful Saturday. I should be recovering from a hangover and out golfing. Fuck responsibility. I miss college.
Randomize
