idk why but i just wanna to have sex with the idea of him. i don't even wanna meet him.
Tonight's Jeopardy categories were "Star Trek, Action Figures, Dinner For One, In Need of a Date, Still Living With Mom & Dad, You Have No Life." Beginning to think my life is the Truman Show.
I don't know how God could bestow someone that emotionally confused with such an awesome penis.
I don't know what happened to get you in this mentality. This time last year your were ass up on a hotel bathroom counter getting licked by a stranger.
does she really think making her boyfriend delete me on facebook is going to magically stop us from hooking up?
I put bits of fruit cocktail in the jello shots i made because i knew that they were gonna be the only thing we ate all day
you better not pull some "waking up at 2 in the afternoon" shit, we have weed to smoke.
Yeah, it kinda sucks. But it was fun while it lasted. And honestly, his penis is way too big for my life.
He's such a gentleman. He didn't even ask why my bra was flung on the seat of my car. He just took my snow brush, pushed it onto the floor and said, "Let's go I'm hungry."
I threw up in the shower, slipped, and fell in it. Should I try and continue my day or just get back in bed?
the only way I will be happy is if my gallon spiderman bucket is full of either popcorn, nutella and peanut butter, or fried rice. CHOOSE WISELY.
He goes "sorry was at the gym. Some of us workout " and I wanted to text him back and go "well some of us do occasional drugs so we don't have to"
Pavlovs bj experiment 2012. Welcome to the program.
If your find a 12 pack on your doorstep consider it a gentleman's agreement to never speak of that night again
I fully support your bad decision but I do not approve of your unironic use of the word yolo
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