using the left over highlighters from the blacklight party to study for finals. feeling the need to write insert penis here on my econ notes.
Disgusting. If I saw her naked my dick would pack up his balls and leave.
for future reference: playing drunken strip-twister is a euphemism for a threesome. just thought you should know.
Hey couldn't find water bottle to put margs in whole bottle in purse gonna stop and get cups and ice from starbucks and burrito from una mas want a quesadilla
You walked away saying that you had to pee and you never came back. We found you an hour later in his roommate's bed. Under the covers. Still in your wet bathing suit.
I really think that guy just walks around with tennis balls in his pocket. No dick is that big
Did we almost burn down the bar last night? I guess flaming shots were a bad idea.
No! Last time I got hit with a beer bottle
Haha, Tuesday man
What's the address and code again...does anyone need anything and why is my viking helmet on the bed?
Had sex in a cemetery last night during a thunderstorm. I feel like my goth points have skyrocketed
I woke up this morning with a text from my mom as to why the hell random people were showing up at the house. Turns out nobody came to our house party because I gave them my old address, fuck pre-partying for real
Why do I always end up with closet ICP fans?
This is my last chance to be the first person to fall off this roof.
They were assless. I wore assless football pants.
Just almost drowned myself in the shower again. I need an adult.
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