That weatherman I hooked up with is on TV again
i went through the entire semester and only just now realized there's a girl in my history class that i've hooked up with.
Weekdays seemed more exciting when I had a drinking problem. Like I had something to look forward to at night.
I think the guy in front of me just puked in a styrofoam cup.
I've reached the point in my life where I desire cats more than men
I really like her...she always overpays me for xanax and still feels the need to fuck me to make up for it....
We are gunna have the best winter break smoking weed and eating ham
I jumped out of a moving car going sixty into my driveway because I had to shit so bad. It is not a good day today.
Bro if you were a bird I would puke in your mouth right now
If it makes you feel any better they literally are drinking alcohol out of a toilet. They are serving drinks out of a nasty ass toilet...!
Don't be hating on my everclear. Never taken a smoother journey into intoxication.
I don't think I've ever been sadder than the way I feel when I finish my meal while I'm high
Blow Jobs and the Patriots Playing I think I’m going to marry her
its 8 and I'm HUNGOVER!! how is that possible??
Nice girl until she takes off the fake human suit and shows you the flesh eating demon she truly is
Randomize
