At what point should shame kick in? Realising I had a one night stand with a man engaged or realising I am that man's wedding photographer?
just ran into a kid I used to hook up with while wearing his shirt. Only me. I tried to pretend like it wasn't his but it said his name on the back so I wasn't winning that.
Makin mac and cheese without you. Definitely seem to do this better inside you. Splashed boiling water on my cock
Remember when we used to share painkillers at parties? Now we're dealing in blood pressure pills. Oh, how the mighty have fallen.
don't get you morals all over my torrid fantasties
Lmao I should put that ad on Craigslist "in need of muscular and determined team of men to carry drunken birthday whore safely home"
420 is off to a bad start. Mark wake/baked WAY too much, and he has spent over $50 on the claw machine in the grocery store.
Well she got high, deleted the essay she was working on, and then ordered dominos. We all manage stress in different ways.
Well, I guess that's how life goes for my dad. One minute you're walking with your cooler on the afterglow of a Lynyrd Skynyrd concert, the next you find your grown son choking out a drunk redneck against your pickup truck.
Never go with a hippy to a second location. I fucking hate Xanax.
I say this out of love and friendship. Eat ice cream not the d.
he called me 'mate' and i had to remind him that you dont call people mate who continously make your dick hard
Probably going to live on vodka sodas and fireball shots
Who knew she had talents apart from chugging wine spritzers
Idk what's worse.... Yesterday not waking up in my bed or today waking up in the hello kitty gown.
Randomize
