I am engaged
To a real live girl that has met me
I think we should urban dictionary "drive of shame." It involves a sprint to your car in his underwear and shirt, surreptitiously trying to put on your bra on at stoplights without attracting attention from neighboring cars, and lurking in your car a block from home so you can know when your roommate leaves for work.
I just saw a commercial for "tickle me elmo hands" and I am almost 100 percent sure that at the end elmo said "yeaaaaa boooyyyyyy"
Worst night here by far. And ive slipped in my own piss so thats saying something
Under no circumstances is it ok to do naked cartwheels in front of anyone. i don't care how much ecstasy you took
And I would just like to take the time to say my boobs look great today.
I went to look at my notes for my take home final and all I had written was 'you're on E. You won't remember a damn thing anyway.'
Sorrye. The bathtuv says hi. But theresno water in it. I've wanted too tell you for the longest, but nevr could
I just passed a truck with its bed lined with a tarp and filled with water with six dudes chilling in the back driving through campus. That looks fun.
I got a lap dance from a guy last night dressed as a school girl. Heels and all. His heels got stuck in my fish nets
I am laying in your bed and just found a bottle of wine under your pillow ...should have married you...
Sooooooo, maybe just fucked on a motorcycle.
It makes my nipple hurt just thinking about it.
I POOPED CONFETTI TOO. Ingested unacceptable amount of it oh my god can I die from this?
I have finally found someone I enjoy for reasons that do not necessarily include his dick
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