After we had sex, she played this little piggy with my toes
I think I just sat on my labia. Can I borrow some scotch tape?
Currently standing on top of my parents leather couch with no pants on playing helicoptor with my penis. You?
I just saw someone EAT a flashcard out of frustration. Finals suck.
Its pretty simple actually, if she texts me either Grr or Rawr it means she is horny and wants to bone. its a perfect system
drunk. just smoked a spliff with a 19yr old hungarian bike taxi driver and bonded over the difficulties of getting weed in a different country. idk y shit like this isnt in the study abroad info packets
THIS IS THE EMERGENCY BOOZE SYSTEM. I AM EN ROUTE TO DEWITT WITH A FIFTH OF TEQUILA. THIS IS NOT A TEST
Yea. It was an issue. Great time though. Apparently I went through the coat check, put my coat on and forgot I had it so I tried to go through again and just didn't understand why thy weren't helping me. Dave coat checked his pants.
I'm pretty sure I said "this might be the last time I'm in here" but then I took his pants off so that's a mixed message
I told him finishing at the same time would be a long-term project. Like flipping a house. A sexual house.
I was less embarrassed asking him to torrent the teen mom's porn. I'm not gonna ask him to about season 4 of PLL.
what a fun peer-pressure-filled weekend
Our DD painted my costume on me for tonight. The strippers have been teaching him how to paint costumes.
In two separate occurrences, I could have avoided getting my heart broken, and chlamydia, all with a left swipe.
I wonder how long it will take her to realize that I peed in her night stand.
Randomize
