I hate u. Im listening to lady gaga and all i can hear is boca base om om om ommmm
you know it's the perfect hook up when you don't have any friends in common with his girlfriend on facebook.
He pretended my clit ring was a door knocker.
Were gonna hotbox in the trunk. I think there's room for another half of a person if you're interested
This bitch flirting at the bar needs to close her legs and open up a book. I can literally feel my IQ dropping every time she bends down to show her tits.
Jealous?
Very.
Everything's a blur with pockets full of jello
You told me if you could get your shoes on, you deserved a coke and rum. We never made it to the party.
I pretty much landed into this relationship penis first
I just had to take a picture of someone whose testicles are bigger than my fists combined. Living the dream.
My brother just text me asking if I was ready for the blowjob of my life.
How many ballsacks did you see last night because I saw eight
The dicks good but it's not two trains and a bus good.
This weekend I turned down sex to watch the Star Wars marathon... Is this growing up?
He yanked my breathe right strip off in the middle of me riding him.
My boss couldn’t find her phone so she asked me to call it and when I found it the screen said Fuck Toy was calling. I’m very much okay with this
Randomize
