went in for an STD check and they referred me to an alcohol and drug councilor. kick me when i'm down.
in retrospect, sexting while high was a mistake - I meant to say "I'll fuck you stupid, baby" but of course I said "I'll fuck your stupid baby"
people should stop making movies, we'll never top bio-dome.
we made malted milkshakes. malt as in malt liqour.
great! i almost saw a gas station fight, and i believe i became the first person to successfully pee and puke in a bathtub simultaneously
woke up laying on an empty pizza box and some guy was doing blow off my butt...i guess i should thank you.
Bren left me with a lovely parting gift. Newfouund alcoholism. I'm on the kitchen floor, hugging a bottle of vodka. It's my only friend now.
Ugh. This is the type of hangover that all other hangovers want to grow up to be.
It's like the sisterhood of the traveling vaginas over here
Just had a 10 minute long conversation with my cat about how if I died, and he needed to eat me to live, I'd totally be ok with it. Definitely still drunk.
I offered him midol and told him "it always helps my period so maybe it'll help yours"
I don't know what part of my sober brain thought it was a good idea to get stoned when I can barely walk with crutches as it is, but that part is stupid.
He walked around my apt complex completely naked and started peeing in the maintenance because he thought it was the bathroom. So yeah, pretty drunk.
He played Harry Potter Fan Fiction videos to get me in the mood. He might be the one.
Come cuddle! I'll be passed out somewhere in the library. It'll be like a scavenger hunt!
Randomize
