Wow, you were right... Weed does start conversations
How was I supposed to know she would get offended when I asked her how long it took to draw on her eyebrows.
It took him longer to remove his skinny jeans than it did for him to finish. I didn't even have time to realize it sucked until it was already over.
Fuck you. how could you leave me passed out hangin out my truck window when you knew it was starting to rain?
You'd be proud of me. They tried to give me bread to sober up, but I told them no, im on a diet.
the last thing i remember was the norwegian kid tacking a bag of wine to the ceiling, then boom! shower drain.
You burned the hair off your arms. Again.
It grows back stronger each time.
i got kicked out of McDonald's for demanding a margarita mcflurry
UGH FUCK THIS TRAFFIC I WANNA SUCK A DICK
I wonder how many people I can tell that he has one nut before he finds out it's me spreading it.
why do guys have to express their feelings when they know your seeing someone else ? I fucked him anyways to make him feel better , and to know what he's missing.
using my tits for other peoples nudes hit me up business in the making
The guy I slept with in AZ just called and is moving here next week.
A lady played my boobs as if they were drums. It's been that kinda night.
Just do what I do and listen to your vagina. She’ll growl when she smells good dick
Randomize
