May have just accidentally purchased an iphone on Kate's credit card. This has potential to be bad.
Wtf. Who made this Big Mac, Helen Keller?
it wasn't sex, it was awkward naked time.
Just spent the last three hours in the library successfully refreshing facebook
He literally had a note from his doctor saying he wasn't allowed to finger me for a week
yeah a little bit of me felt bad about it. But the rest of me was having sex with him.
Got my bloodwork back and my liver is in tip top shape. Apparently blacking out 5 nights a week isn't cutting it, so we've got to step it up until I see that all of my hard work is actually paying off and doing some damage.
I'm not really sure what went on in my mouth last night but right now it tastes like what I can only imagine is a mixture of astroglide and peanut butter. You hungry?
The waitress just told me I'm asking alot. So far I've asked for a soul, an angel and carbombs
I'm running on two hours of sleep, a shot of vodka, and half of a granola bar. I can't be held responsible for what I do.
seriously they are like going to hulk burst through. There are perks and downfalls to having big boobs
So I got drunk last night and attempted to shave a landing strip on my vag. I now have a 8 lane highway on my crotch now. Just looks like a random ass square.
holy fucking shit get me out of here. even the babies are wearing beanies
tried to make it look like I had been conscious/awake and out all day when I stumbled into cvs at 6pm to buy plan B
update: I failed
All I'm saying is Europe has not been easy on my vagina.
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