I met a girl last nite that charged by the inch. i didnt have enough money but i figured shed be a good deal for u
Every time we go downtown I ask myself why we live in Des Moines
i justawanted to let you know that illi aalways be thwew for ui and o qill waasag youer dog whenebvet u wsnt
She kept saying "I'm going to hell" the entire time we were fucking. I really wasn't sure what to do... so I agreed with her.
That was definitely the right answer.
The theme is smores and alcohol. Dress appropriately.
Something about a hand job in a car doesn't scream girlfriend
You "were" hungover, which is past tense. So that gives you no excuse not to go out tonight.
I guess birthday shots aren't always the answer
Also- bikini mowing was a horrible idea. One truck just drove by 3 times, turning around at the end of the block each time. My tan may be better for it but my conscience has been raped.
The best part about passing out on the floor was the fact that when I pissed myself, I didn't piss the bed again.
Just witnessed a fat waitress doing whipits in the back of a waffle house.. my life seems a little brighter..
I've been to his house multiple times since that night and I STILL can't find my bra. And he says the hot tub ate my thong.
he was wearing a pyjama shirt under a dress shirt under a hoodie under a robe under a rain poncho the man was prepared for anything
admittedly, geting that drunk in front of my last two exes wasnt a good idea
probably didn't help that you cheated on them with each other either
Having a bangable neighbor is going to ruin my booty call game. I refuse to go across town for dick now
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