We all need desperate help. Maybe we should just become a group of people who walk around town and shit in peoples air vents
I'm down.
worst part about day drinking... waking up to george lopez
I tried to fuck this guy who I'm pretty sure has an erectile dysfunction
The kid that passed out is still in the bathtub filled with ice and the empties
His little brother just walked in, asked me if I'd blown his brother yet and then announced that he and his friends were going to play outside so we could play too.
I tried to explain to the cop how we all have skeletons in our closets but he just wouldn't listen.
You told me "I need to pound this drinks if I'm going to pretend his dick is big enough" then left. Dollar night quotes 2012
did i really sing to your nipples last night?
yes. and it was oddly very seductive
You get home okay?
I'm pantless and in bed
That doesn't mean you're at home.
just saw a kid get pissed on buy a tiger at the zoo. His dad is rofling and the kid is crying. I think I have to go make a new friend
Omg this place. I'm at a neighborhood party. My mom has kissed two other moms. Where am I
I don't know how guys can take themselves seriously when they see themselves naked
I'm tryna think of an appropriate time to say "when I suck other dicks they seem like training dicks compared to yours" but I really can't think of a good way to say that
No, it's like a legit blood drive. It's not just her out in some parking lot with needles and ziplock bags
So many people have told me I have great tits tonight, I'm unstoppable
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