I just got back to Nicks and I shoul dnot have drank this much when I have to work at 7AM!!!!!
Thursdays are my worst days
but now we sippin champagne when we thirstay?
why did u have a candy cane hung on your dick in the first place?
she has a santa fetish
cute.
Will you be topless? That will affect my answer.
Drunkenly auctioned off my bed for 3 tequila shots
I will come to your office dressed as a bloody mary, hug you then leave is that a good plan?
yes. bring a barf bucket too. just. in. case.
Just came during my obgyn appt. I need to get laid.
Drank a fosters this weekend and last weekend. Listening to down under 5 times a day. Spent 100 dollars on a sleeveless men at work shirt circa 1983. We don't leave for another 5 weeks. I call it pregaming.
I'm just gonna pretend you didn't ask me that. I'll sweep that shattered moment of our friendship under the shame rug.
He barged in the room with no shirt on, all fucking ripped with a half keg under one arm. Sara now calls him Bronan the Beerbarian
It's Friday the 13th and you just got boned by a guy named Jason....
you'll probably come home to me baked as fuck and shirtless
We smoked a huge blunt and then laid in bed naked eating strawberry shortcake good humor bars. We have the perfect relationship.
I saved a note for myself but all it said was "am I a slutty Holden Caulfield?"
I was drunk and on Craigslist.. The drunk-text offers people got must have been either horrifying or glorious
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