Just did shrooms. Don't feel shit! Wsasted 40 bucks on this! Nothing's happenig except for this little gnome on my shoulder and the couch is melting. Fuckin waste of money.
just crush a couple of percocets into it. tell him sam adams came out with a new beer. flavored with sleep.
my brother is about to go smoke a joint outside... he's preparing his munchies on the counter beforehand. I admire his responsibility.
my mom just told me its unladylike to have toothpaste stains on my clothes all the time.. if she only knew.
she's lying on the floor with a bottle of vodka, belting shakira. plz advise.
I haven't seen her in ages, how is she?
Well I woke up next to her this morning so I guess I would say she could be doing better
her mom went out of her way to book us a room with separate beds... her level of gay denial is in beast mode
holy fuck man...it feels like I got beat the fuck out of by death's baseball bat...chimichangas?
I'm 50% sure my cousin put weed in these deviled eggs.
I'm drunk at 3:28
I'm jealous as shit at 3:34
I ended up in bed with a man from London in a sorority wing I am not apart of. Tequila fucks you up
Wake up. Finish House of Cards. Put on pants.
Accurate.
Naw but when she was in the bathroom I threw the condom out the window and I'm pretty sure it hit some girl
I slept naked last night on stolen pillows. I felt like a golden goddess.
dont you DARE use my tequila influenced words against me
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