my vag is singing 'hurts so good' by john mellencamp
No jewlry, no bra, and no pen. I couldnt be more prepared for a friday morning class.
The last thing i remember was high fiving everyone on the planet.
i don't even specifically remember last night, it's just one big wonderful lesbianic blur.
Sometimes I wonder why I hang out with you. And then you show up half naked at my door with a half gal of vodka, and I remember why.
i left after you tried to balance a shot of tequila on your head while screaming at the bar tender that you fucked his girlfriend
i love all of you. Physical. Emotional. Mental. All of it. When we speak i feel like a feather or a dragon depending on the conversation ...
Oh god, so much rum. I think I was in a shotgun wedding with a Bacardi promotion girl.
When one is stoned and browsing online dating profiles all men sound like serial killers.
I ate all his french fries. He was no longer useful to me.
His grandpa picked him up. Brought him to the house. And made him clean the puke off the driveway with a broom and a bucket of water.
We had sex during an intermission, then the second period. The bruins better win. Missing a period isn't worth having sex with him
Do you remember biting my ear and whispering quotes of Pride and Prejudice last night?
I'm glad you found someone that both loves you and is cool doing coke off your tits. Proud of you.
She keeps comparing me to her favorite dildo and I don’t know if I’m flattered or creeped out
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