paul mccartney is starting to look like angela lansbury
The only reason you're wearing underwear tonight is cause you have a family dinner before
i think you shook his penis after he was done peeing.
first time Ive ever had to stop sex to go pass out in the kitchen floor...
Apparently I spent my 300 dollar tax return by ordering ramen on amazon last night. Please tell me this will somehow pay off in the long run.
There was an awkward moment where I was going for his cock and he reach out and held my hand, thinking that what I was doing
im at work. we just had a random 14-year-old amish girl come in and gift us with cinnamon rolls as thanks for letting her use the bathroom. i dont even know.
I had to run home with my hands covering my tits this morning. How does this keep happening?
My favorite part was screaming to all my life by kc and jojo and just horribly failing
I had wine for breakfast at 6am, that's how visiting my parents went.
so let me get this straight... she's showing a cameltoe that can be seen from the space station and I'm NOT supposed to stare?
Im including "no monologues past 1am" in the list of apartment rules. Theatre majors dude.
I'm trying to watch Chicago PD and tell you I like your dick at the same time. It's a lot of work, ok?
I don't really care where everyone ended up, but is everyone alive and not in jail?
Not in jail
Alive?
Do not buy a prego test at the Walgreens you frequent. It's awkward. Just trust me.
Randomize
