and this is why I hate my dad. He got 25x more angry with me when I wanted to drive a different route then he suggested to get to his house (more scenic- thus more enjoyable) then he did when I told him I was driving drunk with 4 people in the car and I got my 5th speeding ticket last night.
Who was more unwelcome: The two of us at the party last night, or Kimmy Gibler at the Tanner residence?
Why do you apologize after every time we have sex?
We just watched planet earth in marine bio. And our prof told us that was all we were doing on 420
i woke up to the sound of my roommate climbing onto my desk mumbling that she was going to bed
I'm babysitting my fucking roommate he took out the screen and is trying to throw dishware in our fucking pool after he repelled off our balcony
took some adderal to make my alochol withdrawl less shitty. now im just concentrating on how badly i need a drink
i repeatedly had to ask him if he was into this because he kept talking about random things while i jerked him off. i got annoyed and in order to annoy him back, i told him i wanted to watch him do it. he also talked about basketball WHILE cumming. NEVER AGAIN.
come over we're fb stalking guys who were dressed as bananas last night because i can't remember which one i blew
I feel like I smell like bad decisions
my nurturing instincts told me to take his clothes off
I think him and kristen are pretty serious now.. I dont think he cheats on her, anymore.
Did I literally just offer a blowjob for help moving? Yes. Yes, I did.
Snorted a dorito chip for 1$. Cross that off the bucket list.
so let me get this straight you just stared at his boner all night?
Randomize
