I totally have a Rabbi on speed dial now. Keep it Kosher.
5 years of college and never once did they teach us how to respond when you overhear a group of 7th grade boys who are in your class talking about how you're definitely DTF
children are so perceptive these days... and horny
i didnt know what to say other then wrong hole.....after that the moment was ruined.
I really need to stop carrying a flask around with me in my backpack at school..
Aren't you in 8th grade?
9th, but that's not the point.
They were picking gravel out of my face for an hour. I think I took more out of the road than the road did of me.
Barfights against pavement aren't genrally won by people. Props.
I no longer see him as a simple set of male genitalia attached to a very sexy body. The title "trophy fuck" seems wrong. Damn.
And you were like "stop making pop tarts, lil bowow" as you grabbed the pop tarts from your ex and consumed them. Teach me your ways.
I think that "I fucked your little brother" wasn't the best way to introduce yourself.....
Can we please get through at least one night out when you DON'T threaten to have sex with one of my parents?!?!
I hate him. I fucked every one of his friends AND his fat brother and he still won't break up with me.
Please don't mistake my med student status for responsibility. I'm drinking tequila while studying vascular surgery techniques.
I've counted four places at work I need to get laid in. Come help me accomplish this.
Hey, I'm your guy
Never in my life did I think i would give a blow job in the bathroom of my old elementary school. Twice.
I'm just drunk enough to be eating egg rolls on the toilet
the party picked up after I got pretty drunk...I got kicked in the fucking head by a tiny lesbian...she was 5'1" I did not think she could do it...i was very wrong
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