You're my favorite asian/girl I've met here.
You're ridiculous
Your hot
Yeah I'm pretty sure at one point I was telling her to keep her dick in her pants. She was going to do some serious damage.
He had a huge mole on his dick. Genetics has cockblocked him for life.
You passed out in the bathroom with the door locked. Had to take a shit in your litter box. Don't worry, your cat buried it for me.
I don't know what's worse....that fact that my dog ate my vibrator or that he later puked it up on my bed
we need to start a braincell conservation fund for you, sort of like save the whales or something.
EVERYONE CAN HEAR YOU FUCKING YOU ARE IN A TENT
Let me be the vehicle for you to live out your slutty half-gay dreams.
I SWEAR TO GOD IF SHE FUCKS WITH OUR GOLD GENE POOL
You are the jesus of drinking
He told me I remind him of his ex girlfriend but in a better more advanced way..
the bucket list is making me question my morals...and sexuality
No offense, but I don’t think I would want to see him in anything skimpier than a hazmat suit.
He graduated. He’s not my GA anymore. He’s just the 24 year old that’s helping me put a sexless marriage in the rear view mirror by exploring the Kama sutra with me
Just found out a shooting happened in our parking lot while it was closed this morning. So thaaaaaaaaats fun.
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