My dick has been asking about u. He said he didn't do anything wrong n I'm a dumbass
Blew in her face. She is Pissed. Yahtzee. As she brushes her teeth.
Don't judge me. It was less weird than it sounds when we were in the moment and it was his birthday
Man the liquor store just wrong numbered me, its a sign even god wants me to drink
Atty had lunch with DA and confirmed I am not the target of the investigation. No word on anything else
They can't keep moving my court date back, i dont know if I'll survive another one of these going away to jail parties.
I found your bra. How you get it off the satellite dish is your problem.
Dear America, sometimes I miss your Everclear and its consequences.
Sean getting laid is an anomaly, Sean banging the hottest single girl at the wedding is a fucking unicorn being ridden by a leprechaun walking through mordor.
My neighbor Chris is here. I am warning you, he is wearing a kilt I just saw his balls. Be incredibly careful that you don't see what I did.
You were peeing on a bus yelling fuck public transit, congratulations.
So, in keeping with the last two years, are we going to watch the new Hobbit movie on acid again? It's kinda starting to feel like a Christmas tradition.
Just saw a rice crispy commercial and got emotional. I need to go home.
COME HERE AND I WILL SUCK YOUR COCK UNDER THE LIGHT OF THIS BEAUTIFUL ELECTRICITY
It's like a donut of clothes around a pair of heels. Like they were transported to another dimension naked.
Randomize
