just by requesting 'I think we're alone now', not only did you achieve emptying the bar, but you also rubbed it in the owners face.
What do you call a girl with PMS and GPS?
A crazy bitch that WILL find your ass!
i might have gotten away with it if "don't tase me bro!" wasn't the first thing i said when i rolled down my window.
just turned my empty handle of passion fruit smirnoff into a fish bowl. I love college.
We videoed ourselves having sex... I now know why I close my eyes during sex
I'd give my left nut to see you
don't do that. I like the set
When health care reform is passed, I'm throwing a kegger
You are the reason we need health care reform
For once I'm glad there wasn't morning sex. Yes, that sore from the night before.
I am going to get arrested. I am yelling fuck repeatedly, wearing a Bird jersey and polka dot pants while pounding wine. Amazing mug shot to follow.
he's the only person i know who can drink himself into and out of alcohol poisoning.
I was still in a towel. We hadn't even started drinking yet and the champagne bottle dropped and exploded literally up into my vagina.
You just sat there and yelled "I JUST WANT TO RUB MY NIPPLES"
Some guy just hit on me and then said, well you look too young to ride the emotional roller coaster and guestured to his dick.
I just almost caught my floor on fire, then decided I could put it out with my knuckles! So I'm doing good!
you know what? fuck you, fuck your nana, and ESPECIALLY FUCK THE BLACKHAWKS.
Randomize
