i pretty much saved your life. you were so conviced that your nail polish remover bottle was "Vodka Lemon"
Would it be too much if i wore depends to new moon so i dont miss any of it?
Got laid at the last second. Facebook chat is good for something afterall.
She told me I reminded her of the fair. And she wanted to deep fry my dick and eat it.
I'll just get wasted and start throwing myself at men. Someone's bound to take the bait
Hypothetically, how much legal trouble do you think i will be in for stealing someone's dog?
And he was super vague about his life, it was frustrating. I totally boned a homeless guy, didn't I?
Having never done that before, When should one expect the horrible shame to end? Days, months, ever?
A week or so, depending on size. In your case, maybe give it a month.
my mouth is as dry as a post-menopausal camel on antidepressant's vagina.
I don't understand how 5 bottles of booze became normal or acceptable per 2.5 people
Seriously, I'm making a calendar and marking off the days with little penis's
The world is a different place when I'm actually having sex
whatever bro. i had ice cream and whiskey for breakfast and its noon. this is the second worst christmas ever.
you were huddled over the toilet, throwing up, and every few seconds you'd look up and say "this is such a waste of vodka" then put your head back down and start puking again
fucked one of the teachers, librarian job's going great
Randomize
