he just payed for our date, after telling him I was leaving early to meet my fuck buddy. is there something lower than friendzone I can stick this guy in?
It's cute how he thinks we're going to have sex again
The family from the blindsided came and talked to us last night. The dad owns 68 taco bells. You would have been so inspired
I standby a snuggie being perfectly acceptable attire for drunkenly walking your dog at 5am. Our new neighbors did not seem to agree.
I love her to death but its like you have to do 5 lines of coke to be on her level.
This is irresponsible on your part, leaving me alone in a bar.
He just texted me saying "you've got a face that suggests you give really good head". Is this a compliment? Do I say thanks?
I will gladly accept you into my home with open legs.
Every time you mention the threesome around him I will high five you. Do what you will with this information.
I'm 2 seconds away from smashing the bottle and drinking it off the counter with a straw.
You know you have a problem when your man yells at you that his penis is not your personal play toy.
last time we were there you stole a tap from the toilets. How are you confused that your bag is full of baubles you clearly can't stop collecting their furnishings
Told a guy at the bar I was hurricane evacuees with no place to stay. Just woke up at his place. God bless Florence
as a guy is it bad that even my mom called me easy?
Is it wrong to want to have sex with one guy who's good in bed before going out on a date with a guy I actually like?
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